In Honor of Mother’s Day, Happy Stepmom Bobbi Hillard Shares Lessons Learned Along the Way

Being a stepmom has its challenges – especially with no prior parenting experience – but I’ve learned that a positive attitude and a generous dose of humor are key to thriving.  Maybe I’m one of the lucky ones, but I love being a stepmom to my two awesome bonus kiddos. To honor all the stepmoms this Mother’s Day, here are a few truths and tips I’ve gained along the way.

1. Paint your own canvas.

YOU get to decide what your stepmom role looks like, and it can change over time. Don’t get hung up on outside expectations. Being a stepmom can be awesome; it’s a special relationship unlike any other.

2. Your house will be a mess.

And some things will get ruined or broken.  Focus on what matters:  family and relationships over things.

3. Give yourself a break.

Just like the biological parents, we received no instruction manuals. We do the best we can.  Don’t expect perfection, and you’ll avoid many a self-imposed guilt trip.

4. Stay positive.

Avoid the websites, blogs, social media – and even other stepmoms – that are snarky or negative. Create a habit of finding solutions instead of complaining.

5. It’s Worth It!

When you focus on the positive, you’ll find so many blessings along the way! From the first time your stepkids snuggle up to you while watching TV, to hearing “I love you” as you tuck them into bed… From the first drawings with you in their family picture, to parental pride in watching their successes… You’re doing a great job, and you’re a part of something bigger than yourself!

Bobbi Hillard runs the StepMom Solutions facebook page provide positive-focused support to a wide audience of stepmoms, and coordinates a similar monthly meeting for local stepmoms.